Books on books on books

I'm in a rare mood of feeling slightly philosophical. [Eww- apologies all around!]. There's this song by Snow Patrol called "Chasing Cars" and one of the lines is "those three words are said too much and not enough" referring to "I love you". [In case that was not automatically assumed]. At first that line used to bother me- surely something can't exist in both excess and scarcity. But that's not true. That line specifically, is a truth. We say "I love you" nonchalantly- to practical strangers, to acquaintances. We say it sarcastically. We say it genuinely and we say it because sometimes it's the thing to say. We say it to smooth over arguments, to end a phone call, and we say it as a call and response- [because if you don't respond to 'I love you' with 'I love you too' then you're kind of a jerk.] And so yeah, we say it in excess. But it's also true that we don't say it enough- someone we love passes away and we would give anything to be able to hold their hand and tell them we love them, because maybe they didn't know. Or we find out someone was suffering and we wish we could have offered them the comfort of our love. Or we find ourselves in a personal tragedy and just wish that above all else we knew we were loved. We need to hear it, and for one reason or another, we sometimes don't. But that's all irrelevant. And my following thought is not at all deep- I just wanted to set the stage for how something can be both overabundant, and in serious deficiency. 

Because my not so deep thought is that I think the problem we (or maybe just I) face is that there is both too much and not enough time in the day. See there's so much time, that I can sleep far longer than I need to, do a full-time job, exercise, shower, read, write letters, socialize with friends, and still have hours to spend watching series on Netflix, going for walks, stargazing, and finding endless ways to waste time. And yet, I lack the time I think I need to take online courses, to learn about investments, to study another language, to catch up with as many family and friends as I should, and sometimes, frankly, I lack the time required to simply maintain my sanity- because there's no private time, no separation, no opportunity to recover. There's no time for naps or for shopping. There's an ever-existent to-do list with items that never get checked off. And it's torture. I find myself lying awake sometimes filled with this anxiety over the fact that I have so much to do and can't carve out the time required to do these things. 

I know I haven't mentioned this, but I'm currently in Nantucket with the family for the month. (I'll be here 10 more days before I head out to go to a wedding.) Anyhow, one of my favorite things about Nantucket is that I read very very much compared to the rest of my year- with so much beach lounging, pool lounging, and time when the kids have to read- I read read read. I've read 3 books in the past 2 weeks and brought 4 or so more- and today I finished an absolutely wonderful book- ["The Fault in Our Stars"] and I was just thinking that there are *so* many books that I want to read or that I should read- and every single day there are more being published. If I started right now, and read books 8 hours a day, I would still never finish all the books I should and want to read before I die! (And we're talking living a very very long life here people!) I mean that's just books. God forbid I wanted to do something meaningful like volunteer, or make change happen in the world, would there ever be enough time? I don't know how we cope with that? But one of the lines that is repeated throughout the Fault in Our Stars is "Live your best life today." I think adopting that as a daily life mantra would be a good place to start. We will never accomplish all our goals, and to aim low so as to be able to check off all our to-do items would be a disservice to ourselves. So it is only fair that we push ourselves with all our might- knowing we will fall short, but somehow managing to accomplish greatness in the efforts. I don't have enough time to read all the books in the world- but I have enough time to read a little every day. And I want to read more, which means since I can't make more time in the day, I'll have to re-attribute my time- traffic time might become book-on-tape time. Who knows. 

At the end of the day, we put our time into the things that matter to us. We show what's important to us everyday. So let's put our time where it matters. 

~Rachel~